By Lee Ordeman
Age changes us, and as we bring our changed selves to keiko, we are forced to make accommodations if we are to continue to do it. At first this can feel like a disappointment. But in time the compromises we must make, surprisingly, fail to compromise us. Instead they open the way to something novel and possibly interesting. We encounter some problems we have not yet faced, and with these problems come opportunities for new insight. Our keiko, as well as our understanding of our ourselves, broadens and deepens. It is as if we increase our capacity or “bandwidth” for receiving the message of the universe.
I haven’t the flexibility, the wind, or the stamina I once had. I have pain in my knees. My right hip and right shoulder are liable to complain. But each of these complaints is the universe manifesting itself in a fresh way, and each gives me something to work with, a problem to solve, resulting in a refinement of technique, a discovery of a more efficient way to move, a better way to warmup, and a sensitivity to know my limits and call it a day. As my body weakens, slows, and takes longer to recover, it teaches me to adjust. I find myself listening even more closely for the message of the universe.
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I once told Ito Sensei I was having difficulty with this expression, “the body is a message of the universe.” The profundity and universality the words convey have always inspired me, made me wonder, and stimulated my thinking and desire to do keiko. However, I did not know how to understand the words in regard to one of my students. She had lived since birth with cerebral palsy, which forced her into a wheelchair. She walked with unbending legs and only with the aid of crutches. How, I asked Ito Sensei, does the expression apply to her? Do they hold up in her case? Would they ring hollow to her? Clearly the universe’s message might feel unfair or even cruel to someone so challenged and who cannot do keiko as it appears in our textbooks and videos.
Ito was not puzzled by the question. As I remember, he simply told me to consider that the “body” referred to in the expression was the body in general, or all bodies. We receive the message not just by means of our own bodies but through those of others as well. He challenged me to receive the message via her body as well as my own. While I could not tell how his response answered my question, I felt my unease with it resolve.
It occurred to me that I was projecting onto my student an emotional response to keiko that she had not, in fact, expressed to me. As far as I could tell, she found keiko interesting and fun, and indeed, I saw her grow and gain confidence as she practiced.
One of her favorite practices was kumite with jo while seated. I would attack her with the jo in dai jodan and jodan while she received with ichimonji uke. When we first started this kind of kumite, she was timid and would tense and struggled not to shut her eyes as she raised her jo to meet mine. Eventually she relaxed and as I swung my jo down on her, her eyes would brighten, and she’d break into a beaming smile as her jo shot up to receive mine.
Afterward I’d give her a moment to catch her breath, her face happy and damp with perspiration.
Message received.
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